Adventures in Babysitting

Overheard today while the kids were waiting at the table for the lunch I was prepping:

"You wanna play hide and seek?"

"Yeah! What if...What if you hid in heaven?"

"I'm on God's team!"

"I'm on Jesus' team!"

Hmm. Isn't that the same team?

---

Overheard while the kids were watching Ice Age 2: The Meltdown:

"Who's coming after him?" as the short breathing-reed slides silently through the water towards the unsuspecting ant-eater kid.

"Just a turtle."

"A turtle's gonna eat him?"

"No, he's just comin'." The water explodes in front of the young ant-eater, who screams and runs away. A prehistoric tortoise with a reed sticking out of his mouth snorts laughter to himself, then slips back under the surface to find someone else to play his little joke on.

"Oh, look, there's the turtle! Now what's going to happen?"

Out of the reed comes a small gasp, then it disappears under the water.

Matter-of-factly, like he should have known better: "Look, he got eaten."

"Yep."

---

From the movie, said by a possum to his brother, in a group that also includes a female mammoth who had been raised as their sibling, a male mammoth, a male sabre-tooth tigre, and a male sloth:

"We might be the only creatures left alive! We'll have to re-populate the earth!"

"How? Everyone's either a dude or a sister!"

Never mind that they are not even the same species!

---

Also from the movie; a conversation between the two mammoths:

"You realize what this means, Ellie? It means we have an opportunity to save our species, now."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you know. It's our responsibility--"

"Wait, what?!"

"No, no! That came out wrong!"

"I'm not a mammoth for five minutes, and you're hitting on me? Well, I got news for you! You won't be saving the species tonight, or any other night!"

Jude: Why are you laughing, Mommy?

Me: (snorting) I'll explain when you're older.

---

The kids were outside, picking up pine cones from the enormous pile of them dropped by the tree in our front yard. I go out to check on them, and there is Brinay, blithely holding the only five flowers I had in my flower bed--red and yellow tulips--in her tightly-clenched fist, a gift for her mother, no doubt.

I sighed. A little later, when I had time, I started a few more sunflower seeds sprouting, so I can plant them on Saturday.

---

E-mail from me to Jason, as I start on cleaning my fourth bathroom today:

"If you were wondering about what I might like for Mother's Day this year, I would love it if we hired a cleaner for a day to come and clean this house from top to bottom.

That would be great.

Love you."

Ain't life grand?