Reassessing

Many people consider the New Year to be the time to reassess their lives, goals, and priorities. I used to think the same, until the time my oldest child began kindergarten. Then, the yearly rhythm somehow shifted, and August and September seemed to be the more natural time to "reset" and rebalance everything.

Usually, I am trying to decide which things I want to commit to for the fall. This year, I am trying to decide what I can cut out.

Since last year was my first year in many not home schooling, I took the fall season to just kind of "learn to breathe" again, and catch up on my life. Much of my day was occupied with occupying the little dynamo who is my youngest son. However, despite the fact that Levi is a full-time job on his own, I am kind of used to maintaining several full-time jobs at once, and often think I can take on more than I really can.

So, I guess it's no surprise that by this spring, my schedule was over-full once more. I looked forward to the less-scheduled days of summer just as much as ever.

Only problem is that this summer maintained a level of "busy-ness" much greater than I normally prefer. As it draws to a close, I don't really feel like I got to draw in that steadying breath in the hectic cycle of my life and just "pause."

I think there is some delusional part of my brain that really does believe I can do it all: be the ideal wife, super-mom, sister, and daughter; cook all our food from scratch that I have first grown on my own farm by the labour of my own hands; maintain an orderly and clean household; volunteer at church; volunteer for the orphanage; be a good friend and maintain meaningful relationships; run several businesses; promote said businesses through marketing and social media; and have energy left for the creative outlets I find so necessary for my mental and emotional well-being.

The logical, thinking part of me reads that paragraph and realizes the sheer impossibility of it all. But that afore-mentioned delusional part of me is NOT okay with that.

So, the question becomes "What can actually be changed? What things can be done by others? What things must I make time for to maintain health?"

Sometimes, the things that stay on the "must-be-done" list are chosen by others--like the migration and rebuilding of my store (www.wintersdistributing.ca) that I now have only four months to complete. Or they stay on the list because of previous commitments or because we need the income.

But still... I am looking for things to change. I pray that I can discern the activities the Lord would have me choose.

What kinds of things does fall make YOU think of, friends?